Thanks for the responses on the haiku. After some thought, I should have=
=20
stayed closer to Aiko=92s original sentences:
Beautiful shakuhachi
Melting, hot D.C. -
Too bad I can=92t make a sound
I especially liked Jeremy=92s haiku, largely because they followed Aiko=92=
s=20
original sentiment closely. However, based upon my worldview I would=20
slightly change Jeremy=92s opus 2 as follows:
Original from Jeremy:
hot d. c. summer
this beautiful flute rests here
waiting for my breath
My modification:
hot d. c. summer
this beautiful flute rests here
indifferent to my breath
I liked Kyosei=92s haiku as well, which was obviously an improvement over=
my=20
initial effort. Tim=92s and Dave=92s were good too, but expressed differ=
ent=20
sentiments than Aiko=92s original statements.
Regarding the 5-7-5 =93rule,=94 you=92ve all shown that it can certainly =
be done=20
in English, but I was reading some translations of Issa and they didn=92t=
=20
follow the rule at all.
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This archive was generated by hypermail 2b29 : Mon Feb 03 2003 - 09:09:53 PST